Do you ever dread weighing yourself?

Do you ever lay awake in the morning worrying about what that number will be?

Maybe you try to remember all the things you ate yesterday, wondering whether they were the right choices.

Will today be a good day? Or will it be a bad day?

When you step on those scales I’m guessing one of three things happens.

1. The number goes up

Your heart sinks. Feelings of shame and disappointment take over your body. Your biggest fear came true… you gained weight. Logically you know it is impossible to gain 2 pounds of fat overnight, but you have no time for logic. Your brain is too busy with negative thoughts about yourself or scrambling to figure out how to ‘fix’ it. You either plan to restrict what you eat for the next few days, or you let the negative thoughts swallow you whole. ‘Why did you eat that extra slice of bread!!’ you think. Inevitably, both of these thought processes end in you overeating at some point. You wish you hadn’t weighed yourself at all.

2. The number stays the same

Phew, it didn’t change!  After a moment of relief to see it hadn’t gone up, you get a pang of disappointment. It still wasn’t the number you wanted to see. You would think about all of the things that you ‘shouldn’t have’ eaten and would promise yourself to eat ‘better’ today. Either that or you feel angry and frustrated your efforts aren’t giving you the results that you wanted. ‘Stuff it’ you think. “Why do I bother eating healthy and exercising if it clearly isn’t working?” You decide to get fast food for lunch today, because what’s the point of even trying. Later that night, you worry about what the scales will tell you tomorrow.

3. The number goes down

Yes, excitement! You check and triple check the scales just in case you somehow stepped on the scales wrong. For a short while, you feel great! But then you feel nervous. What if it was just water weight and it all comes back tomorrow? Maybe you’re tempted to eat even less today so you lose even MORE weight tomorrow? Or maybe you are tempted to ‘reward’ yourself for your efforts. ‘I deserve this ice-cream’ you think… until later that night, you begin to regret it. Maybe that was a bad idea.  You dread stepping on that scale tomorrow, what if I gained it back?

If any of these three resonated with you, then weighing yourself may be causing you more harm than good.

Many people battle with their scales every day.

I know I did.

I know most of my clients did too.

self-weighing is related to increased concerns about weight, increased depression, decreased body satisfaction and poorer self-esteem in people who are sensitive about their body image. This is especially true for women and teenagers, who are more likely to experience negative emotions from weighing themselves.

If this sounds like you, it’s important to know that you are not alone. One in five people in the UK report feeling shame about their body, and according to a 2016 study, it was estimated that 57% of women had tried to lose weight in the last year alone. It is clear that this a common struggle.

So if self-weighing is making people feel so bad about themselves, why are they still doing it?

Why do people weigh themselves?

It can be hard not to worry about the number on the scale when we live in a society that values thinness. Some people believe that they will be happier or more confident if they are thinner. Others weigh themselves because of concerns regarding their health.

However, not only are the scales not very accurate, but they also tell you nothing about your worth, or your health (see my last article on having Health at Every Size).

Whilst stepping on the scales can be useful for some people and for some medical needs, for others it can cause more harm than good. Being unhappy with the number on the scales can encourage restrictive dieting which, for most, results in rebound weight gain, disordered eating, psychological distress, slowed metabolism, reduced self-esteem, weight cycling (see my previous article on Why Diets Don’t Work). 

If not weighing yourself, then what?

You may be wondering how you are supposed to manage your weight without knowing what it is. But what if I told you that focusing on weight is actually distracting you from your bodies natural weight management system?

Whilst it is possible to lose weight in the short term, the body has powerful physiological mechanisms to bring your weight back to where it wants to be. In short, when you lose weight your body responds by slowing down your metabolism, making you hungrier, and think about food more often to bring your weight back to its happy and healthy place – its set point. 

These powerful physiological mechanisms are so strong that they can actually cause our body to ‘overshoot’ its needs. This is why most dieters regain all the weight they lost, and sometimes even more.

So what can you do instead?

Intuitive eating uses mindfulness to teach you how to get back in touch with your bodies internal hunger and fullness cues, to work WITH your bodies natural weight management mechanism rather than against it. This is known as the non-diet approach. Evidence shows that this approach can improve lifestyle and eating habits, self-esteem, body image, and mental health.

Tips to ditch the scales

If you have made the brave decision to ditch the scales, well done! You’ve made your first step to improving your mental and physical health.

Breaking a habit can be hard, but I have written some tips to help you ditch the scales.

If you would like to begin your journey to making peace with food and your body, you can get started today with my FREE audio guide and actionable workbook (below).

Remember: You are more than just a number on the scale.

Firstly, let’s just clarify what I mean by ‘dieting’. Dieting is anything that you do in order to try and shrink your body. Whether it’s a juice cleanse or a ‘lifestyle’ change jazzed up as some kind of wellness thing.

You can have health and wellness without the never ending battle of trying to shrink your body. I have written about ‘why diets don’t work‘ and how you can have ‘health at every size‘ so I won’t go on.

So do you want to know if you’re ready to stop dieting? 

This questionnaire has been written to help you identify the ways in which dieting may have interfered with your life. To help you identify where you are currently at, and where work may be needed with your relationship with food.

This may help you identify whether you’re ready to stop dieting, so that you can save money and create more brain space to be the best version of you!

If you would like to talk through your challenges with me, you can schedule a FREE 20-minute no obligation call.

Alternatively, you can get started on changing your relationship with food TODAY, by listening to my FREE audio guide on 7-steps to find food peace and food freedom.

Sign up below! 

“I don’t like the way I look”

“I wish I looked more like X”

“Once I’ve lost weight I will feel more XXX”

“Once I’ve lost this weight I will be able to XXX”

“There’s something wrong with me”

Are these things you hear yourself saying? I can certainly put my hands up to saying some of these things to myself previously.

Nowadays, we live in a society that is more and more obsessed with appearance. Both teenagers and adults are flooded with images of society’s idea of “perfect” bodies. We see adverts of diets co-opted as “lifestyles” designed to “transform and sculpt”, compounding the message that we are not good enough as we are. That we need to shrink or change our bodies to feel more worthy, accepted, happy and to have better health.

As a Registered non-diet Dietitian, specialising in Intuitive Eating, I work with clients to help them heal their relationship with food. Body image work comes into this frequently. This is because many of the food issues my clients experience, are underpinned by them trying to shrink or change their body.

What is body image and why does this matter?

The Mental Health Foundation describe body image as “a term used to describe how we think and feel about our bodies”. As a society, we are becoming more aware of the impact of how we think and feel about our bodies on our health and wellbeing. In fact, just recently the Mental Health Foundation conducted an online survey of 4500 UK adults over the age of 18, and 1100 teenagers (aged 13-19). They found:

• 1 in 5 adults (20%) felt shame about their bodies.
• 34% of adults felt low or down and 19% felt disgusted because of their body image.
• 13% (1 in 8) even experienced suicidal thoughts in relation to body image.
• Just over one in five adults (22%) and 40% of teenagers said images on social media caused them to worry about their body image.

So what is positive body image?

Positive body image doesn’t have to mean floundering around half naked shouting to the world that you love your body (although that’s also totally okay). For most of my clients, it’s about getting them to a place where they are not actually thinking too much about their body image. Where they can be at weddings, parties, events and get involved in other activities without body image holding them back from being present and participating. As a Registered non-diet Dietitian, specialising in Intuitive Eating, I work with clients to help them heal their relationship with food. Body image work comes into this frequently. This is because many of the food issues my clients experience, are underpinned by them trying to shrink or change their body.

Below I have outlined 5 steps you could take today, that may help improve your body image.

5 steps to having better body image

1) Adopt some self compassion

We often find it easy to direct compassion towards a friend, animal or young child who is suffering. Perhaps we feel affected by their suffering, and have a strong desire to help them ease that discomfort. Self-compassion is about directing that compassion inwards to ourselves. Recognising our own suffering, not avoiding or disconnecting from it, and generating the desire to alleviate and heal that suffering with self-kindness (Neff 2003). This may sound a little spiritual, and if you’re not into that, stick with me here. There is some sound research to suggest that adopting some self-compassion may attenuate body image dissatisfaction.

So how can you adopt some self-compassion?

• Quit following #fitspo #fitspiration images on social media, and start following some #selflove and #selfcompassion quotes instead.
• Give yourself permission to be imperfect. After all, there is no such thing as perfect!
• Recognise that you’re not alone – 1 in 5 adults feel shame about their bodies.
• Talk to yourself like you would your best friend that felt dissatisfied with their body.

2) Ask yourself who’s profiting from body hatred?

The diet industry is worth $60 Billion and is profiting from trying to cure you from a problem that really doesn’t exist. How are you fuelling into this and how else could you best spend your money?

3) Get clued up on weight science, and understand that weight does not define your health

This social requirement that we need to achieve an “ideal weight” is based on the misconception that we can completely control our body size. You may be surprised to learn that some of the most basic assumptions you hold about weight and health aren’t supported by scientific evidence. Misconceptions:

• “It’s just calories in versus calories out right?”
• “Surely shrinking your body shouldn’t be so hard, I’ve just not go the willpower”.
• “Thinner = healthier”

Unfortunately, weight is not that simple. We know (and maybe you’ve experienced) that in the short term, weight loss is typically possible. But over the long-term the body has compensatory mechanisms that undermine its ability to maintain weight loss. Health is not dictated to by what the number says on the scales. You can read more about that here

4) Can you show your body some respect?

You may not love or even like your body right now. But for now, how can you show it a basic level of respect? Here are some examples:

• Nourishing it regularly with food that you enjoy
• Wearing clothes that fit you and that don’t pinch
• Taking your medications
• Having regular medical and dental check ups
• Move your body in a way that feels comfortable
• Allow it adequate sleep and rest

5) Notice how diet culture is deeply ingrained in our society

Diet culture is everywhere. It teaches us that we’re not good enough as we are. That we have to live a life of constant monitoring, controlling our bodies, restricting ourselves, and over exercising. It’s not until we open our eyes to this messaging, that we can start to shut it out. Here are some examples of messages that promote negative body image that we are often not aware of:

• The consistent diet advertisements – on Spotify, in the gym, in the doctors surgery, on the train, tube or bus, on TV.
• The casual use of fat phobic language – jokes around the dinner table, in the office, on TV and in films.
• The general assumption that larger people are lazy, lacking in will-power, incompetent, unclean and undisciplined.
• The lack of body diversity in the media.
• Public health campaigns that shout about the “obesity epidemic” and place blame on those people in larger bodies being a “burden” on the NHS. These indirectly stigmatise larger bodies and indirectly contribute to appearance-based bullying.
• The way we talk about food – good/bad/healthy/unhealthy/guilty/indulgent/clean

This work is hard so don’t expect to master is overnight. Consider how many months or years you have you been trying to change or manipulate your body? It’s normal for this work to take some time and it particularly difficult to embrace in a society that’s telling you otherwise. If you’re struggling with your body image it’s important that you seek support from a qualified professional who can point you in the right direction.

By Katherine Kimber, Registered Dietitian & Founder of Nude Nutrition

What is a food obsession?

Food obsession can be:

– Always thinking about, talking about and planning your next meal

– Only allowing yourself to eat certain foods and labelling them “good” and “bad”

– Not being able to concentrate on tasks, especially if you know the “bad” foods are in the house

– Not enjoying social occasions if there are “bad” foods present

– Declining those social occasions in the future, because of the stress of not knowing what you can eat

– Constantly thinking about how you can get yourself to eat less

Can you identify with any of these?

If you’re wondering how to stop thinking about food, or why you can’t stop eating when full, you’ve come to the right place. 

Food obsession is common, all-consuming and exhausting.

I have been there myself, and as a Registered Dietitian, I work with 100’s of people to help them move away from it. I know that swinging between “diet land” and “doughnut land” is no fun.

In this article I am going to cover; what food obsession is, how it comes about, and how to stop food obsession.

Why am I obsessed with food?

Obsessing over food happens when we place rules around what and how much we eat. These rules can be self-inflicted rules that we’ve picked up over the years, or stem from an external source (e.g. a diet/pursuit of weight loss).

Restriction can be physical or psychological. 

a) Physical restriction: when the food is “forbidden/not allowed” and you are physically prevented from eating it (by yourself or others). E.g. no lunch before 12 ‘clock, no carbs after x time, points, calorie or meal limit. 

b) Psychological restriction: when certain foods are labelled as “naughty” or “bad” and we carry guilt and anxiety for wanting to eat them, or actually eating them.  

If you’re in the latter, chances are that diet culture has taught you to label foods as “good” and “bad”. This is where we feel “good” for eating a salad, and “bad” for eating a cookie. Placing a moral value on foods can interfere with our relationship to food in a negative way. 

What happens when we restrict as a result of these food rules? 

More often than not, food restriction leads to feeling deprived which leads to binge eating. Before you know it, you’re in the continuous restrict/binge cycle that looks like… 

a) Restrict: eat less than usual/eat only certain types of foods/try to be “good” or “healthy”/cut out certain foods or food groups/fill up on low-calorie foods. 

b) Struggle: feel obsessed with food, feel hungry, constantly think about the food, and more annoyingly, the food you’re actively trying to avoid.

c) Binge: cave into cravings, eat more than usual, feel out of control, eat all of the foods you’re actively trying to avoid.

d) Feel bad: feel guilty, ashamed, full of regret, tell yourself you’ve got no willpower.

e) Repeat: start back at a).

Sound familiar?

The initial restriction can make us become totally obsessed with that food.  This food obsession can cause a bucket load of different emotions too. 

Obsession with food can affect our mood and our relationships. It can affect our energy levels and desire to exercise. It can cause tainted memories of special occasions because you weren’t able to truly enjoy yourself because the food that was present controlled you. It is time-consuming. It can make you feel alone, lost and helpless. 

It can make you feel as though there is No. End. In. Sight. 

This is no way to live. 

So how can you stop food obsession? 

The crux of it is giving yourself permission. This is how to stop thinking about food all the time.

And I dive DEEP into all of this in my bespoke one-to-one nutrition coaching program, Reclaim Your Intuition.

Because when we label foods as “good” and “bad”, we feel “good” for eating a salad, and “bad” for eating a cake. When we let go of this moral value and see foods as neutral, we get to actually taste the food and ask questions like “am I hungry?”, “do I want it?”.

It’s time to unlearn the food rules that have dictated which foods are “good” and “bad” so that you can finally enjoy all foods that make you feel good. This sounds scary, I know. The biggest fear is that we will just eat ‘junk food’ all the time. Whilst it may feel that is the case in the short term, this dissipates as time moves on. This process is called habituation – it’s a scientifically proven thing! 

I am going to use a non-food example to explain habituation. 

Imagine buying a new top that you love…

When you first wear it, it feels exciting!

Maybe you even wear it more than normal at first, however, after time it heads into the draw with all of your other clothes. It still feels nice to wear at times, but you’re not obsessed with it like you were at first. The same happens with food. When we allow it in, we get used to it and whilst it may still taste good, it becomes less exciting.

Let’s look at an example…

Say chocolate is your “forbidden” or “bad” food that you feel obsessed with. Be specific about the brand, type and flavour of chocolate. Because if you’re introducing chocolate buttons, chocolate biscuits, chocolate toffees, chocolate icing all at once it will take you 4 x as long to become habituated to it. Be specific about the brand a flavour! 

Next, plan out when you would like to practice eating it whilst giving that chocolate your undivided attention. Perhaps at a time when you’re not too vulnerable (I.e. stressed, tired or hungry). 30-60 minutes after a meal is a good time. 

Practice eating that food paying attention with all the senses. Give yourself permission to eat as much as you want. Over multiple days repeating this practice, chocolate will gradually become less exciting.

As an Intuitive Eating Coach,  this is where I guide my clients through a mindful eating exercise. It’s amazing to hear what flavours, textures, smells and emotions people notice when they pay attention. Eating mindfully and without judgement allows my clients to identify firstly, whether they actually like the food, and secondly, how much of that food is necessary for them to find the point of satisfaction.

In Summary

Stopping food obsession can take time, but it’s possible when we stop restricting ourselves. It takes time to feel comfortable allowing “forbidden” foods back into our life – particularly if you’ve immersed in diet culture for many years. It’s not about training yourself to eat less, or finding more distraction from eating. It’s about getting your needs met, honouring your hunger, and giving yourself more permission. And this is not something that has to be done perfectly or all at once. It is a process to help you realise that you can trust your body and realise that food doesn’t have to control you. Once you stop restricting, food obsession will fade and you can start to enjoy all the fun, meaningful things in life again.

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